OC: Platinum Heart

[DjRari3]

Name: Platinum Heart

Gender: Male

Species: Pegasus

Age: 23

Description: Tall, gray, pegasus. Dark grey mane with stripes of white. Same with tail.

Background: Born in Cloudsdale to a wealthy family. Worked in weather around the age of 18 but soon realized he wasn't meant for it because he couldn't keep up with the others. He became interested in architecture when he started learning about the history of Cloudsdale's creation. Later became a skilled architect and moved to Ponyville. Works on designing and maintaining many buildings in different cities and towns. He is very good at his job and as a pegasus, he can manipulate clouds as well as other materials which lets him make structures in Cloudsdale.

Personality: Very creative with his work. Can be shy when meeting new people but will liven up once getting to know them. Very happy that he has a great job and friends. Sometimes gets frustrated when interrupted during work because he will lose focus. Also is not very good at keeping track of time.

Cutie Mark: Steel heart with screws on the side. It resembles his skill at designing machinery and buildings. He earned it after designing a house for a new pegasus moving to Cloudsdale. He worked very hard and came through in the end!

Use: Forum RP.

Other: My first Roleplay OC.

[Twilight Sparkle]

Hey [MENTION=4598]DjRari3[/MENTION]

I think you're off to a good start here, but try to work some detail into the backstory! What did he do when he worked in weather, and how did he come to think it wasn't for him? After that, how did he get into architecture? Was he working in weather as a colt, considering he got his cutie mark working in architecture?

Another thing you could try is writing little backstories that show various personality traits and the way Platinum acts. When is he shy? In what kind of situation would being interrupted bother him? The more you can fill in a picture of the character, the better idea you'll have of how to RP him when you start to roleplay with others. You say he's creative, so let's see you get creative about him!

The only other thing I would advise is trying to avoid any possible things which may impede on canon. I'm not sure if we know enough (or if it's relevant enough) to know who/when Ponyville's town hall was designed (for), but it may be for the best if you simply avoid that detail. Edit back, and let me know if you have any questions!

[DjRari3]

Thanks Twi! I will edit later when I have more time!

[DjRari3]

Thanks to Jello for new photo!

[DjRari3]

I was thinking of asking a mod to close this but I decided against it. Anypony have some feedback?

[Twilight Sparkle]

I was thinking of asking a mod to close this but I decided against it. Anypony have some feedback?

Why didn't you bug me to check this again? It'd have been acceptable months ago.

Not sure if you're still interested in RPing or not, but I'll accept it and give you permissions anyway. Check the rules, they've lightened up a bit.