OC submission: Robin Hoof

So I managed to dig this up from the past and I think it still fits the guidelines.
Name: Robin hoof
Gender: Male
Age: 24
Species:Unicorn

Appearance: See Avatar

Background: Robin hoof was born in a wealthy family as his father called was known as the Earl of Foxely and his mother was called Joan Silverheart. As his family was rich he was sent to a highly praised school from 5 up to when he was 16. Robin had a few friends at school but thought most of them were posh and uptight (similar to the personality of diamond tiara). He thought that the people who weren't as rich as him and deserved at least a couple of bits to live off of. So once he graduated from school he decide to give to the poor by donating money to the church and giving some bits to the locals. At the age of 10 his father taught him archery and gave him a special handcrafted bow and quiver that once belonged to his grandfather the previous earl of Foxely. He arrived in ponyville after one of his bullies from school Became sheriff of Trottingham and kicked him out of Trottingham for giving money to the locals and not acting the way rich people should be seen.

Personality: he is a kind pony who always cares for the ponies less fortunate and wealthy than him. He is easy to make friends with but despises ponies with a personality similar to diamond tiara and silver spoon.

Cutie Mark: Robin Hoofs cutie Mark is a bow and arrow after he won the Equestria under 16 archery championship at the age of 12 by getting all three of his arrows in the exact center of the target at a range of 150m.

Use: Forum RP
Optional:

@Cobrabrony
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately there are a few little issues with your character.

As far as we know there are no earls within Equestria, nor much else of that kind of cast. While it certainly is okay that his family is wealthy, you would have to remove titles such as this.

When you mention poor people, exactly how 'poor' do you think of? As far as we can see from the show there is no poverty that goes into no housing or no food territory. The closest would be more in the lines of not having all the fancy stuff or similar, rather then needing any base necceseties.

As far as we know, there are no churches in Equestria. We have never heard a mention of any gods above Celestia and Luna, and while they might have a sort of demigod-status, it's unlikely that there is any worshipping of them. You'd have to remove this.

We also see an issue with his leaving of Trottingham. To begin with, we have never seen any 'police' besides the royal guards, who seem to be far more for show then for action. As such the existence of a sheriff seems somewhat out of place.
Even if we granted that one would exist, however, we do not find it likely that the sheriff in question would ever kick someone out of the town for anything bellow a really serious offense - which as far as we know doesn't happen in Equestria. He certainly would not be able to do it just because Robin Hoof is not 'acting the way rich people should be seen'. It just does not fit into what we have seen of Equestria.

Finally, we would also prefer if you could include your apperance in the submission itself, by a link to the picture if nothing else. This is just so that there is no confusing issues if you were ever to change your avatar.

If you have any questions or wish to talk about any part of your submission you can always contact me and I'll be happy to see what I can do to help you.
-Lyssea